A season is part of the whole year

Posted in Judy Fraser passed away Christmas 2018, quietly, at home with her family. She will be much missed by many.

A season is part of the whole year

Keep the bigger picture in mind while taking each small step. Especially if you are feeling impatient or frustrated that what is happening is beyond our control. When we feel out of control we become self-involved maybe even greedy, forgetting we are working on behalf of the good of all.  Try to make things easier and make things more enjoyable, playful and have fun where you can.  Rather than fight reality, the more we can accept people and situations as they are, without judgment or blame, we can start to see the blessings within the apparent burdens.  Include all, the self included, as best you are able.  Time to jump into the unknown supporting and being supportive.

Time to take a more balanced approach and embrace everything that is happening, as it is clearing the path for a new cycle. Rather than judge things as 'good' and 'bad' things may still be working themselves out. Surrender to the flow of life, wherever it is taking you, and set a path for the next few months.  Rather than change what is beyond our capacity to understand we begin to understand what life is gifting us.  If we are flexible we can yield more easily and change our direction as required.  If we are rigid or stuck in our ways life becomes hard and uncomfortable, stay flexible and be open to new possibilities.

We are in a month of new beginnings.  But this isn't just any new beginning.  This month...and for the remaining months of this year...we begin to pivot toward the all new everything.  Each of us are being presented with a major choice-point...a unique and unprecedented opportunity to sever our cord from duality. No more duality just choice.

Face the truth however hard it seems. Once we know the reality we can do something about it.  Accept people as they are and not as we would like them to be. Once we can accept a person’s choices are their own, we are more able to forgive them if their choices don’t coincide with our own. So surrender to the choppy flow. There is no point in fighting life, we will always come out the loser. When we let go of old attitudes we are more able to deal with things.  Trust that life has your back. Without an innate trust that life wants us to thrive, we can become anxious, stressed and depressed Everything is happening perfectly even when we are unable to see how!  When we can let go, we can enjoy the ride, whatever is happening!

Ask what triggers our impulsive side? What keeps us stuck in old habits that die hard? What behaviours do we repeatedly indulge in regardless of how poorly they’ve worked out for us before?! Identifying these now will help us curtail impulsive reactivity and discern what truly needs to change.

This month signals a time to wipe the slate clean in any recent conflicts. Just because we’ve clashed with others doesn’t mean we’re bound to be forever at war. On the contrary, we may have far more in common than we know! Human nature is cyclical, moving in ebbs and flows of togetherness and understanding, strife, separation and discord, then back to connection again. All is in constant motion, nothing remains the same and any notion that people never change simply isn’t true. This is a time that both softens and strengthens our relationships. It supports a compassionate heart and courageous spirit. At times we need to be willing to say the tough stuff with bold love, knowing it is the truth which sets us free and frees others.  It is sometimes the hardest truth of all, too easy to swoop in bully and control within the lives of others.  High drama and intensity aren’t necessarily the hallmarks of a meaningful relationship. If we can’t withstand the demands of everyday life – the mundane realities that form much of a day – we may be using a relationship to escape life, not to share that life intimately with another. Relationships come in all shapes and sizes. Comparing one to another is largely pointless. But for those wondering where a current connection will lead – ask Is it what I want and what I need?

Suggested self-reflection:

1.  Ask yourself if you’ve been turning a blind eye in certain areas?  Things that have been hidden are being exposed, what form is this taking for you?

2.  We need to restore balance and take responsibility for choices and resulting actions.  Are you getting sucked into areas that need not concern you?

3.  We want to eliminate the inner critic now.  Don’t get taken hostages rather shine more brightly and review things that have been achieved.  Manage time and ask what projects are important and what you can contribute?  Ask don’t barge in!

4.  Rather than trying to change or ‘fix’ another look at how it maybe reflecting our own behaviour and see what needs changing within us.  List what these these maybe, work out how to negotiate.  Sometimes we loose the diplomatic stance.  Work out where we may have attacked or gone on the defensive and then work from the same side.

5. Be yourself and be as honest and truthful as you are ready to be.  Don’t compromise yourself in favour of others but don’t betray yourself either.  Re-establish the boundaries you need to keep while respecting those of others as well. Assume nothing, ask don’t tell.  Take another view on where you may have done. Have you slipped up in the past so you can trust yourself not to make the same mistake again?